Before starting to write more often on my blog, I feel the need to recap months that I have not been writing a lot. It´s a nice process on getting into the mood of writing.
Thinking back on my writing journey, I have liked to plot down my thoughts in a notebook, on my blog, in articles or by writing a book. Or two.
During the process of writing my own book, and straight after starting on the book with Ida and Mimmi, I needed a break. To reassert the feeling of writing, to let the thoughts wander by them self and not be caught on a paper.
The last month I have been missing the process of writing. And it was hard to start, I felt like I did not know how or when or why. But the feeling doesn´t always need to be as we think it should be, I think it´s enough with a desire. So I start from there.
I´m really looking forward to do a little recap going down memory lane.
8 months pregnant!
In January and February I was very pregnant. I did my last travel in January, when I went to Barcelona to present my book. After that I was writing on Moonvalley diaries, and spent my time outside with Maui, or preparing Majs room, or just resting as I felt like I need to do a lot.
In March 2019 our daughter Maj was born. And it felt like she had always been part of our family. I could write a whole book about her, as she is the sun in our lives, the stars on the sky, and the wholeness of life.
Maj on one of her first power naps at home.
I had given myself 2 month to not think about training, in the sence of a professional athlete. I was thinking of training, as the best way for me, after being pregnant.
As I had mostly been on skis during pregnancy, due to winter, but also that I did not feel very comfortable running. My belly was not huge, so in a way I´m surprised that I did not feel good running, but, as we all know, every one is different. So these two months I mainly walked, jogged a little ( mostly uphill) and did a little bit of strength training. More about pregnancy and post pregnancy training in another post.
In end of June I started to feel eager to train, especially as I had a goal to run a 100 km in end of august. Thinking back to this goal, I will not put up another goal like this 5 month after being pregnant. But what did I know? It felt good at the time.
Photo from a road, only uphill,half marathon in the beginning of june.
I started my training block with a lot of respect, and told myself to only train if I felt like my body could handle it.
Here from a marathon in the beginning of july. I did races because I think its so fun. And good training!
I had a few weeks of 50km running, then some weeks of 70 km of running, then 90 km and then I jumped into big block of training in august, leading up to the race I wanted to finish. At that time, Maj was 4,5 month, and I started to feel like myself again. I could do 20-25 hour weeks. I was still breast feeding, and that took a lot of energy.
I started the race, but I stopped at 70 km. I don´t know if it was mostly my mind, it physically hurt to be away from Maj. It´s hard maybe for some to imagine, I got a lot of comments about this, but it really did. I felt like I missed her so much. And it was only 1 day. Now when she is 14 months, I don´t have a problem ( I miss her of course) to be away for a night or two, but at that time it was to long. It was what it was.
In September we left to Himalayas. Kilian had a big project in mind, and part of our team was there, and family too. I had a project to climb Island peak from Pangboche and back, but the weather and conditions was not on our side. Maj had a good time, she was exactly as happy and slept as good as home. I will write more about traveling with a baby in another post. In high altitude as well.
I had some really good training there, the I.P attempt, and some other long days too. I felt so good in high altitude! I thrive up there!
Straight after Himalayas I went to run Ultra Pirienu. As Kilian stayed a little longer in Himalayas I changed from the ultra distance to the short race.
Here I started to feel like I was deeply tired. My body could not run fast, my heart could not beat enough.
Finally being home after some months travelling, I got immensely tired. As I look back I can understand it. Not sleeping a full night, training as normal, being a fresh parent, traveling, finishing a book, doing events etc.
At that time I felt terrible, that I wasted my pretty good shape, in being just tired.
I took a step back and I tried to give myself a bit of time, and be kind to myself. That is hard to do.
October November I hardly train. Looking back in my training log, it´s a depressive sight. Especially the notes. Tired. Heavy legs. Slow heart beats.
I tried to be kind, not feeling stressed, and it was a constant work to do that. When all I want to do, and all I´m “suppose” to do is to train, to get in a good shape, and race.
Finally December came, and if I have not told you yet, I love winter season. I love to train on skis, and I finally started to feel like I could train.
I asked Kilian to make a training schedule for me, as I did not want to think about what and how to train, as I felt like that would take energy from me. I needed to reduce things to do, and mainly focus on training and resting.
It was so good to start to train again. For sure it was hard work, coming from 0 but I dug my head down, did not think about every session, I just did the work.
After some weeks I saw small improvements.
January came and I was in a pretty good training bubble. I just did the work. Some trainings I really enjoyed and some I just did. But I enjoyed the process to build up my strength again.
My goals for the winter was 2 longer ski mountaineering races, and I started to feel like they could go pretty well. I surprised myself in a world cup I did, as my feelings was horrible, especially in the downhills. So that was fun.
Then we all know what happened, the Covid 19 entered our world.
I will stop here, as the rest feels like it´s more in present time.
Thank you for reading. Hope you will follow me on my journey back to my blogging.
