As a high level athlete, ambassador, influencer it comes responsibility, it comes days to work with sponsors, and with media and community. I don’t mind that, its part of the work. But to find the balance can be tricky sometimes.
Last year for example when I finished my book, I handled a lot of the work behind tromsö skyrace, I had my own project, and at the same time I should have switched from skiing to running, and I didn’t make it and on top of this being a pro, and handle what comes with that. It was some tricky months, and I think I almost got a bit burned.
Right now I feel a little the same, I feel a little pressure over my chest, like my time is not enough for what I want to do and should do, what I want to give back to all those who are supporting me. I need to take a step back, but at the same time I cannot. I have all planned. I need to make some things.
I want to be able to make more events, meet more of you who are following me, and when I do I really like it. I´s incredible to meet so many, to have a little talk about running or whatever that we have in common, and I try my best to give back as much as I receive, but I think I can never make it as the energy pointed towards me is much more than I can give back to every single one, you know what I mean?
And I think that is what makes me drained. It feels like I can never give back the attention that it so loving towards me.
And it feels like I can barely speak about stress, as I “should” have the easiest peaceful way of living.I mean I live on the country side, and I don’t have a “normal” 7-4 kind of work. I have learnt many years ago that I don’t like to have to many dishes on my plate ( Swedish expression), I think you get what I mean. But sometimes it´s hard to say no.
I tell myself that I do enough, that I can say no, but I also now that the more no I’m saying the harder it is to work with me.
My solution?
I donat have one, but for now I will mentally prepare, I will ease my mind. I will focus on the thing I love and need to do: Train. At least for 1,5 week I have a little less on my plate. I hope this will build up my peace and make space for the summer that are coming.
Lot´s of love XX
